


Naked

by Allthecircles



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Gen, Good things happen to Tony and everything is perfect, Not Canon Compliant, Self-Acceptance, Therapy, not a time travel fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-29
Updated: 2019-01-29
Packaged: 2019-10-18 23:36:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17590559
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Allthecircles/pseuds/Allthecircles
Summary: "Ms Everheart, how would you like to know everything?"The blonde's eyebrows rose to here hairline, and despite her skepticism Tony could see the calculations running behind her eyes "Everything, Mr. Stark? Are you proposing a tell-all about the so-called Avenger's Civil War?""No," Tony said, and the word slipped so easily off his tongue, he grinned a grin he hadn't felt since he'd hidden Edwin Jarvis' house slippers under his bed and said he hadn't when he was four. He was free, he was secure, and nothing could hurt him. "I'm going to tell you everything you've ever wanted to know about Tony Stark. A full 12 page spread. What'dya say?"The light in Christine's eyes was feral.





	Naked

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for your interest! As you'll see from the tags, this work is not current MCU compliant. Nothing after Civil War matters here, and I will, frankly, probably be taking a few liberties with that as well. This is a Tony-centric fic, mostly for my own amusement and because I think he's an amazing character. This work is heavily influenced by all the fanfic I've read over the years, so suspend your canon-accuracy meter and you'll be good.  
> As always, if any of this upsets you, feel free to not read it.

Anthony Stark did not pace.  He did not wend his way back and forth across the retrofitted lounge, smoothie in hand, until there was  nearly  a footpath in the carpet.     He was not nervous;  on the contrary  , he looked forward to today's interview with an almost perverse sort of anticipation .

When the helicopter carrying Christine Everheart landed on the front lawn, Anthony did his best to stay calm  . He forced himself to stay in the lounge with his half-drunk smoothie.  He watched from the monitors as the reporter and her cameraman disembarked and slipped into a waiting car  . Watched the car pull to a stop in the underground garage. Forced himself to count to five before moving to face the elevator. A grin would not be appropriate, he knew, but it was hard to keep one off his face. Christine was a  prickly  one on the best day, and he did not want to give her any reason to think he was not being 100% genuine.

Christine was about to get the most authentic Tony Stark experience ever. Even he didn't know what was going to happen.

He also  apparently  didn't know what to do with himself.  When Christine stepped into the lounge, Tony  awkwardly  stuffed his hands into his pockets until her eyes finished cataloging the wide room . When her cameraman stepped off to the side, Anthony made an aborted effort to go tech talk with the man. Antony settled for rocking back and forth on his heels, smoothie forgotten.

 

 

Christine,  however  did not seem to care. She continued into the room, considering every piece of furniture, every painting on the wall, every speck of dust, even, it seemed to Tony. It took a moment for him to realize this was B-roll footage, as the cameraman panned slowly from his spot near the door to follow her progress.

 

"There's a bet going around the journalist circles that you were never going to allow any of us in here, you know," she ventured after a moment . By this time, she was out of frame, and Tony watched the cameraman's hands adjust the zoom on the lens as it focused on him. 

He shifted to lean against the nearest wall, off to his left, allowing himself to visibly wince when that put pressure on his..everything. "Where'd you place your money?" It wasn't his usual level of cocky, but then again, he was done with that now. 

The reporter smiled. "I've learned not to bet against you, Mr. Stark." She gestured to the cameraman.  Tony could see the red recording light reflected off the man's glasses, and Tony fought not to look  directly  into the camera . "Where can my guy set up?"

"Actually I thought we could walk and talk for a bit." He gestured down the corridor  vaguely . " See the sights, check out where I want to reroute a river, that sort of thing. I know that's not usually how you and I work..."

Christine seemed to consider him for a moment, and Tony fought not to fidget. "What exactly are we discussing here, today, Stark? You were  suspiciously  noncommittal when I asked over the phone, and now you're acting...odd."

 

Tony shrugged, feeling a nervous little smile crawl its way to onto his face.  He sort of supposed, what with the artificial over head lights enhancing his sleep-deprived and  slightly  bruised visage, that he looked like hell,  .  He'd been up almost nonstop for the past four days, ever since he'd  been released  from the secret SHIELD hospital in Germany  .  He'd had a lot of thinking to do once the drugs keeping him stable and preventing infection had worn off enough for his mind to achieve constant linear thoughts  .  He'd considered scenario after scenario after bloody scenario, and had finally come to a decision . One that had shaved a good ten tons of stress and anxiety off his shoulders.

 

Tony had felt gleefully wrong-footed, like the ground could crumble under him at any moment and send him plummeting to a death he knew wouldn't come. It had been the most  bizarrely  freeing sensation he'd ever had  . Of course, he shouldn't have   been surprised .

 

He had always loved  being naked .

Maybe  that was where he went wrong.

"Ms Everheart, how would you like to know everything?" 

 

The blonde's eyebrows rose to here hairline, and despite her skepticism Tony could see the calculations running behind her eyes "Everything, Mr. Stark ? Are you proposing a tell-all about the so called Avenger's Civil War?" 

 

"No," Tony said, and the word slipped so  easily  off his tongue, he grinned a grin he hadn't felt since he'd hidden Edwin Jarvis' house slippers under his bed and said he hadn't when he was four . He was free, he was secure, and nothing could hurt him. "I'm going to tell you everything you've ever wanted to know about

 

Tony Stark. A full 12 page spread."

When Christine grinned, the light in her eyes was feral.

 

 

~*~*~

 

Tony doesn't stop talking for nearly four hours.

Of course, he's been known to ramble on when spectacularly drunk or excited by some Science!, but this was more calm and intentional than he'd ever been with his words and Tony knew if nothing else that alone kept Christine's glossy red lips pinned shut through his entire monologue.

He tells her of his life from birth to escaping to MIT at fourteen, all about Edwin and Ana Jarvis, and how he'd been utterly destroyed at their deaths. Gives her all the details the press had never been able to get a hold of from the first story printed about his wild college sex-and-alcohol binges, the real details that he'd never even been able to tell Rhodey. But Rhodey had saved him, made sure he'd never been alone again on the rare occasions he ventured out to a party, had been endlessly annoyed with every fake drunk-Tony story that made the news. If Christine or her cameraman doubted he'd been drugged and sexually assaulted by half a sorority within his first week, none of them were able to say a thing. He told her about Howard Stark, in perhaps more detail than was warranted, and how Maria Stark, bless her, had been sweet but distant when she wasn't drunk or depressed.

Tony led them around the Compound, never staying in one place too long, weaving stories of the former Avengers going about their lives with his history. He tells them everything about Afghanistan, about Obie, about Hammer and the palladium poisoning and all about being left half frozen in the Siberian bunker. The truth about Ultron and what really went happened behind closed doors and the real reasons behind the path of destruction his former team had led across the planet. He talks about providing for the team in every way they needed and a lot they didn't, and basically being treated like crap in his own home, and how his therapist insisted that he was being treated like crap, no matter how he tried to defend the team's actions.

He talks about always wanting kids, and how a lot of his drinking stuck around because he'd been convinced he was too messed up he'd never be able to have any of his own, and he hadn't wanted the possibility to haunt him, so he threw himself into the Stark legacy of alcoholism. He'd built robot kids though, and had tried to content himself with that, but even though he loves them, its not the same, and he couldn't abandon the dream, couldn't drink it away no matter how he tried. He told her how he whispered the dream to Pepper late one night while she held him after a nightmare about the portal, and how she'd laughed at him, at the absurdity, thinking it a joke. He'd never recovered from that, he confides in Christine. He's not sure he ever can.

Tony talks until he thinks he might be sick, and once he realized that he'd bared his every secret, even having to replace the arc reactor and by Thor, did that hurt, Tony fights back a grin.

He's naked.

As sure as he's standing in the Compound's massive mess hall wearing a simple dress shirt and jeans over several layers of bandages, Tony knows he's as naked before this reporter, before the world, once they see the report, as if he'd stripped when she walked in.

Its beautiful, and Tony felt the grin creep over his face, even as a rebel tear tried to blur his vision. No more secrets. No more pressure to be anything…at all. He didn't have to be perfect, no one would expect that from him now.

"Why tell us this?"

The slow, slightly awed question shocks him, a little. Tony didn't expect her to be able to form words so soon, but Everheart had always been a sharp one.

Tony shrugged. "I got tired of hiding. I got tired of trying my best and always coming out the villain, so I'm done. I don't want to have to uphold Howard's legacy and I don't want to pretend I'm invincible when I'm not. I'm done being the scapegoat, putting my neck on the line for people who won't do the same for me. Tony Stark is dead, he died in Siberia. Anthony Stark is going to be spending the next few months relearning to breathe and sleep without drugs or alcohol. I'm going to be figuring out what I want, and what I can have. I want kids, and a dog. I want SI to build games and themeparks. I'm going to pour a ton of money into the arts, because everyone needs them. I'm opening up the Compound to any powered individuals who are willing to sign the revised accords. There's a threat coming, the invasion in New York was not a one off, and we need to be ready, but I'm not going to obsess over it. I'm going to live. I'm going to get my hands in all sorts of pies, bit I won't be stopped just because someone doesn't want me to. I'm not running around looking for acceptance anymore. This interview is an explanation, and a notice: the Tony Stark you knew is dead, and this is why. "

An hour later, Tony is alone. Everhart hadn't had any more questions, a feat Tony didn't think was possible, and had wrapped up her taping in the front entry way before leading her cameraman (Mark, Tony had found out when he'd apologized for mostly ignoring the man) out to the waiting helicopter.

He wandered into the his private quarters to perch on a stool by the breakfast bar. He should probably get something to eat, but his chest ached with a pain he had thought he'd never feel again, and his appetite was shot.

Well, no time like the present to start on the next phase of his nakedness.

He was more fond of that word than he should be, he absently noted.

He pulled out his Starkphone, the latest prototype with a flexible screen, thumbs flicking and swiping through a series of actions Pepper had specifically told him not to complete. Ever. Too bad she had quit yesterday. Tony would have loved to see that vein pop on her left temple as he completely ignored her shrill yelling.

Harpy.

He had expected it to hurt and it _had_. When she'd barged in on him yesterday, full of righteous anger about the Accords and how he treated his former team and his inability to put anyone else but him first, Tony had been crushed. It had _hurt_ to see Pepper choose that side of the fence. When she'd refused to let him explain, snapping that _Rogers_ had already explained and that he was _right_ , right about Tony, right about his ego, right about getting everyone around him killed, Tony had gone numb.

"Well, you know where the door is, Potts." he'd said. "You don't like my decisions? Leave." It had been so easy, slipped right off his tongue.

It had actually been kind of like taking a really deep breath after holding it for years. Or having reduced lung capacity due to a lifesaving mechanism shoved into your chest. Ironic that, since he'd just had to have said lifesaving mechanism reinserted, he breathed easier, figuratively speaking at least, than he had since Extremis. Except a part of him didn't know if he wanted to be breathing at all.

Dr. Ben told him, but Tony hadn't believed him, hadn't even considered it was possible for him to 'have low self-esteem and approval addiction', but that was then. There would be no more doubting Dr. Ben.

Everything set up, Tony took a quick selfie. Nothing fancy, and skipped the filter options on the next screen. This was about being free, and transparent. Naked. He tapped out a caption quick, not giving himself time to think about it. Dr. Ben recommended he try that, since if he gave his mind the slightest opening he'd think himself into a downward spiral it would take days to come up from.

_My name's Anthony and I need a nap. Any tips? #icantsleep #nightmaressuck #imissmymum #sheneveractuallyputmetobed #butialwayswantedherto #thatsprobablywhyicantsleep #someonegetmytherapist #ithinkimhavingabreakthrough #ormaybethatsgas #troubleeatingagain #metalinmychestkeepingmealiveagain #thankscaptainrogers #nearlydyingwasgreat #ineededmorenightmarematerial #yourethebest_

He never said he wasn't bitter.

Three minutes after he hit post his phone buzzed to life. Tony gave a genuine smile to nothing in particular.

"You know, I wondered if I should have given you an acceptable list of hashtags when you first mentioned this plan. Not that I think you'd have even looked at it, mind you -"

"Course I would've looked, Doc. Right before I reminded you I don't like to be handed things."

"You're not taking the meal supplements?"

"Can't keep them down. After that first night I decided I can live off carbon dioxide. I can tree."

"You cannot tree, Tony. Trees're green. You look like a brusselsprout in green."

"You wound me!"

"You wearing green wounded my eyes. I had to see you every day you were in ICU. My retinas will never recover."

Tony snorted. "Lightweight."

"The best." Dr. Ben stood up from a creaky leather chair, and Tony let the bored part of his brain trace the man's steps around his office through the sound coming through the phone. Tony had never seen it, but he could imagine well enough as the conversation flowed. "How's the rest of you? Your pain meds still okay?"

"Yeah, they're fine. I didn't need to take any earlier and even after talking a reporter's ear off for four hours only my chest aches. Nothing I'm not used to."

"I hear Pepper left."

Tony deeply appreciated Dr. Ben's ability to bounce from one topic to another, only staying long enough at any point of conversation to gather the necessary info. It was similar enough to the way Tony thought he could almost forget the man was a shrink.

"Figures that would be news. She decided I was a horribly selfish person because I refuse to do what Rogers said. I told her if she didn't like it she could leave."

And if Tony flushed a little at the doctor's "Good for you, Anthony", there was no one around to see it.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


End file.
